Sunday, July 10, 2011

The Blonde

The Blonde


     Aimlessly wandering was exactly what Dylan was doing in Philadelphia on a Saturday morning in the fall.
     Dylan was one of those restless guys constantly on the move. Philadelphia afforded him the opportunity to get this out. He loved going to Elfreth's Alley, the art museum, and center city, which were all separated by huge chunks of blocks.
     The sparse trees throughout the city were beginning to turn color. Green leaves gave way to reds, oranges, and yellows. He had one hand in his hoodie and the other was holding a Starbucks coffee. It was as dark as the evening before.
     He took small sips of the coffee.
     Mmm.
     He looked at the words L-O-V-E written in scarlet red with the L and O stacked on top of the V and E. He became distracted by the fountain shooting water into the blue sky behind the letters. He observed the pool the fountain water fell into. Nobody had their feet in it.
     It's certainly not the summer.
     Dylan stopped studying the landmark and moved through the streets as a cheetah would in thick grass looking for prey. He was walking towards the location of the Rocky statue, at the Philadelphia Art Museum.
Rittenhouse Square popped into his mind.
     Maybe I'll check it out. It's on the way.
     Rittenhouse Square was packed with people as Dylan sipped the strong coffee. Guys and girls were holding hands and talking. The women smiled with their mates. Dylan always loved a woman's smile. Some couples would embrace in a kiss. Older gentlemen walked their Weimaraners and Golden Retrievers enjoying the suns rays as they darted in between Philadelphia's skyscrapers.
     Dylan continued walking hitting the pavement quicker than most walkers. He looked ahead to see where the next block began, and he slowed down like a car coming to a red light. She was walking towards him with another girl.
     She's beautiful.
     The woman looked only a few years out of college, had long blonde hair and was taller than most women, even some men. Her face was carved with the finest biology of skin and molecules. It was like beauty was born with her face. She wasn't wearing makeup. Dylan became a little anxious.
     Don't stare.
     The blonde smiled and turned to her sister as her lips moved. Her smile revealed white teeth.
     I don't have a chance.
     Dylan and the blonde got closer to each other, and he tightened his grip on his coffee cup clinging to something for comfort. Her green eyes met his blue eyes, and Dylan smiled without showing his teeth. She smiled back, and Dylan felt his heart beat a little quicker. The two passed each other as street cars would traveling in opposite directions.
     I have to talk to her.
     His running shoes stopped above the concrete and one of the laces flopped up. He turned around and walked towards her.
     “Hey,” he said raising his voice.
     “Hi,” she remarked startled.
To be continued...

JL

15 comments:

  1. Very descriptive! Excited to see where the story leads...

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  2. i like the tone you set. very interesting u zoned in on the season of fall too, all the details makes it easy to visualize. def want to learn more about both of their personalities.. he seems very insecure, what's she like and where's this whole situation going to lead?

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  3. Jenny, thanks for your feedback. I was taught by John Biguenet to write for the seasons and that's what I tried to do.

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  4. Anonymous, thank you for your feedback. Fall is such a beautfiful time of year. So, it seemed fitting they would meet then. I would have some work to do with character development so we'll see what happens. Dylan is insecure.

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  5. the everyday-ness ( or should l I say every night -ness :) of this story is brought to life with your creative use of words.
    well done, looking forward to reading more:)

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  6. @lattebonn, thank you for your feedback!

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  7. ha. i see i'm not all that anonymous. you're right though it is a beautiful season and the time of year can lead your characters through the nice days and cooler nights to come, holidays, etc. interesting to me because i have not read too many stories or know too many real couples who have met that time of year. so have u any idea what you are doing with your characters yet? is this to be a book?

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  8. The great descriptions allowed me to vividly picture every moment in my head. Many men find themselves in this same situation but few have the courage to approach the woman like Dylan did- so I am excited to read the rest of the story.

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  9. @Anonymous, first of all, you are anonymous, even though you might be asked to provide a website or something.

    I didn't consider the time of year as something that would serve as a metaphor or have some other relevance. I had some snapshots in my brain about the setting as I was writing the story, and I think that guided me into placing it into the fall.

    The fall season has many wonderful things from temperature fluctuations, depending upon your location and changes in colors, which I think makes fall so special.

    Thank you for your time in reading. I'm not sure I want to delve into writing a book at this time, but I may want to enter it into a writing contest at some point.

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  10. @Steven, thank you for reading and your comment. It takes a lot of practice to write something really descriptive, and I'm learning about the process now.

    You are right in the courage Dylan had. It's very hard for men to do this as there's a big risk in rejection and hurt feelings.

    Thank you for reading.

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  11. Is the blonde someone you know in real life? You described her as if you've seen her before in your own life.

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  12. @Anonymous, I do know the blonde in real life. Although, I haven't met her in person. I've seen pictures and put some things together from what I've heard.

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  13. It was very suspenseful , like a romance novel. You need to continute the story so I know what happens to them both. Your a great writer, very descripitve details. Love the scenary how its set in Philadelphia.

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